SOME RULES TO BE FOLLOWED WHILE RIDING A BIKE/SCOOTY

(FOR BEGINNERS PARTICULARLY)


1. Drive slowly, cautiously & hence safely.
2. If you are too slow to change gear with varying speed then let your bike to be stopped in crowd rather than dashing someone.
3. Don’t feel ashamed if the above thing happens, because it’s less shameful than to hit someone.
4. Whatever happens don’t hit anyone, even if your bike/scooty stops in the middle of the road & increase the agony of your followers.
5. Whatever happens don’t go even near to a possible hit to a GIRL, WOMAN, LADY or whatever in feminine terms. Because then you will be hit by every passerby & to every parts of your body. This rule should be followed in every circumstances.
6. Always have a helmet with you. It can save you from head injuries ........... when you’ll be thrashed by people.
7. Know traffic rules properly, so that you should not follow a single one. Because no one follows & if you will follow then you can cause accidents.
8. Try to take driving license with you always, so that at least you will have a legal right to hit someone as others have for you.
9. Know different and important parts of bike, so that at least you would know which part does not need repairing.
10. Don’t take your mother with you. She will frighten you with her constant remarks on your unseen mistakes & unsafe driving. And you will actually end up in accidents.
11. The worst thing that should happen to you is you go to
Hospital not to Police station + Hospital. Keep this in mind.

NOW GO AND BE A RIDER.....

TODAY's News ( Dt. 29/06/2010)

PTI-
"Suffering from hypertension, blood pressure; just gorge on a chunk of chocolate daily, for a new study says that it could have the same positive effect as an half an hour exercise. Study showed that the chance of a stroke decreases by 20% if the people with high blood pressure eat chocolate everyday.The magic chemicals present in chocolate which does this are Flavanols."

But, Hey Guys!! Don't you think that will really increase the chance of being diabetic which will eventually lead to blood pressure problem. (karam phoote mere!!!)

"In other news, Johana Sigurdardottir, Iceland PM, married her long time girlfriend (Ya!it's girlfriend) as a new law legalising homosexual marriages came into force...."

Now, This is what I call 'leading from the front'.... We need this kind of brave leaders in India too.

"In another news, the suicide of model Viveka Babaji has been showing on news channels as if the nation's future depends on it and her ex-boyfriend had been arrested and now as usual he has applied for bail."
Now, this is the case of "GHOST OF GIRLFRIEND PAST".
Guys, beware of depressed girl friends! Give your girlfriend chocolates everyday having lots of Flavanols so that there won't be any hypertension and also your caring attitude may come to the surface(also do regular sugar test!).

"A chocolate a day, keeps police away."

A mathematical Theory of LIFE

Equation 1

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Human = Donkey + work + enjoy

Therefore,
Human - enjoy = Donkey + work

In other words,
Human that don't know how to enjoy = Donkey that work
============ ========= ========= ========= =========

Equation 2

Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Men = Donkeys + earn money

Therefore,
Men - earn money = Donkeys

In other words,
Men that don't earn money = Donkeys
============ ========= ========= ========= =========

Equation 3

Women = eat + sleep + spend
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Women = Donkeys + spend

Therefore,
Women - spend = Donkeys

In other words,
Women that don't spend = Donkeys
============ ========= ========= ========= =========

To Conclude:

From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Men that don't earn money = Women that don't spend.

So, Men earn money not to let women become Donkeys! (Postulate 1)

And, Women spend not to let men become Donkeys! (Postulate 2)

So, we have?
Men + Women = Donkeys + earn money + Donkeys + spend money

Therefore from postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude,
Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!

-- Adapted

Today's News (Dt.27th June 2010)

The Indian Express-
Scientists have claimed that Yawning is a sign of sexual attraction rather than a desire to sleep.In fact, it can demonstrate a range of emotions like Stress, Interest on someone or even wanting to have beep beep. And they have completely disapproved the previous established concept of getting more oxygen to the brain...
What the hell man? I mean literally, this is heavy.
What happens in our class guys????
But thank God I don't yawn in the class because I don't listen at all.
Can I have a poll who yawns the highest in our class??? That would be cool man. Rakesh! Bach ke rehna! I guess you might win this yawning cum beep competition.

RULES TO AVOID GHOSTS

1. Don’t murder any one.
2. Don’t let anyone fall in love with you. If s/he suicides or dies then you are finished. Same applies to you.
3. Don’t go even near to any house which is termed as HAUNTED. If ghost of that house would be like that of GRUDGE, then you are gone, even if you go to other planets.
4. Don’t be too curious to any supernatural things. Because CURIOUSITY KILLS.
5. Don’t build your house without knowing the history of that place. You can dig the ground deep to search for presence of any SKELETON. Advantage- You can even find remains of DINOSAURS.
6. Don’t buy any house in cheap without knowing its past. Otherwise you may end in becoming the SAD owner of the house.
7. Avoid strangers in the lonely jungle roads.
8. As you don’t know the religion of the BHOOT, so carry holy symbols of every possible religion.
9. Avoid going to creepy places like lone ruins, caves etc.
10. Avoid traveling late in night. Because you may scare them.


FRAMED AFTER EXTENSIVE STUDY ON HORROR MOVIES

An anatomy of Boy-Girl Relationship

With no other option available other than growing older, the Hormonal change brings massive changes in looks, voice, body physique etc. And at this age only, things like attraction, likeness & so called love sprout among us and just like an adult pigeon couple, a lot of Jodis emerge in a specific population. Most of the times these are not permanents as different permutations can be seen for a particular individual. It’s probably due to human nature of getting bored at one thing if it lingers for long or always looking for better options. Because of these kind of popular Boy-Girl things, a simple relation has totally been overshadowed. For instance, If I am seen with a girl then she is obviously my “girlfriend” unless otherwise I make an unselfishly definite statement (forgetting how attractive she is!) that she is my sister or “I look her as my sister, yaar.”

There is no problem to have someone being called your girlfriend but problem is the meaning of Girlfriend or “GF” is not as simple as it is written or spoken. The other synonym of it is “Current Lover” or someone who is one part of the Jodi where you are the other part. And the term GF itself doesn’t sound permanent nor it indicates a friend who happens (fortunately or unfortunately!!!) to be a girl, because I remember one of my friend saying that the term friend has no gender linked to it and that’s why Boy friend and Girl friend words shouldn’t be used casually to distinguish male friends of a girl and female friends of a boy respectively.

Now, the question is, not a question actually, the problem is why the hell all have the mentality of thinking that there is something fishy going on when a boy and a girl become good friends(as they say a boy & a girl can’t be friends). For them I want to say- “Grow up guys. It’s not fairy tale or fantasy movie that there need to be such things.” Relationships are messy, so why not stay or think to be single and enjoy life as much and as long as possible till you fall in so called love (?????) and then enjoy being in love.

The problem with a boy (most of) is he simply thinks that a girl who is caring, affectionate and a good friend of him is actually in love with him and probably that may happen, there’s no doubt about it. But most of the case it doesn’t happen and the boy ends in having a broken heart and may be loss of a good friend. But there’s no fault of girl at all in most of cases if there’s a good friendship since girl doesn’t cheat on the boy, never says that she loves him to gain advantage, actually the boy’s assumption and expectation let him down. He feels cheated without actually being cheated. And some cases they become Devdas. But two things they should always keep in mind-

1) This heart- broken attitude finishes a good friendship.

2) And there are always a plenty of fish in the sea.

TODAY's News

The Daily Telegraph-
A series of studies carried out on 3,000 people aged between 60 and 100 showed that wisdom comes from the brain slowing down in old age, making elderly people less impulsive and driven by emotion.
Scans of elderly people's brains also found that their ability to learn new skills was undiminished despite their advancing age.
U must be thinking why the heck I am giving this boring information to u, the reason is we have among ourselves the exceptionally talented exception for this concept--- the one n only-
THE VIRUS...
Even science defies in front of VIRUSSSSS..............

In other news, it's being learnt that our faculties are demonstrating the space problem that usually occurs among wild animals in Jungle ecology due to intrusion of Human population.

Kudos to them, they are taking so much pain from now on, all of them, to teach us our course of Ecology, that too so practically!!!